The healing potential of kink for trauma survivors
At Progressive Therepeutic Collective, we are a proudly kink-affirming counselling practice, working across Australia.
We embrace a sex-positive approach and we love to explore the fullness of our sexuality. Sarah Newbold is our primary kink-affirming Counsellor.
Unfortunately, kink is still often seen as a taboo subject in society, with many people being hesitant to discuss kink openly and honestly.
However, for those who have experienced trauma, kink may potentially provide a uniquely healing experience. It may assist survivors to reclaim power, express themselves more freely and explore their sexuality in a safe and consensual environment.
Kink can provide a healing experience for trauma survivors in several ways. Firstly, it may allow survivors to reclaim power and control over their bodies and experiences. Trauma often leaves survivors feeling powerless, vulnerable, and out of control. By engaging in consensual power exchange dynamics and exploring boundaries, survivors can regain a sense of control and empowerment. This can lead to increased self-confidence and self-esteem.
Trauma can lead to shame, guilt, and fear around sexuality. Kink may provide an opportunity for survivors to express themselves freely, explore their desires, and connect with their bodies; leading to increased pleasure and intimacy, and a sense of freedom and liberation.
Kink may also provide a cathartic experience for survivors. Trauma can lead to a buildup of emotional pain and tension in the body. Engaging in kink may provide a release of that pain, stress and tension - through activities such as impact and sensory play.
Navigating the Journey with a Therapist
Engaging in kink as a healing experience for trauma survivors can be complex and challenging. It is important to navigate that journey with a therapist who is knowledgeable and experienced in the subject matter. Here are some tips on how to do that:
Find a therapist who is knowledgeable about kink (look for descriptors such as ‘kink-affirming therapist’ or ‘kink-positive therapist’). Ideally, locating a therapist who has experience working with trauma survivors and who understands the dynamics of power exchange and consent in kink.
Communicate openly and honestly with your therapist. It is important to be transparent about your desires, boundaries, and concerns. Your therapist can help you explore those areas safely and consensually.
Set realistic goals and expectations. Engaging in kink as a healing experience is a journey that takes time, patience, and effort. It is important to set realistic goals and expectations with your therapist and to approach the journey with an open mind and a willingness to learn.
Prioritise safety and consent. Safety and consent are paramount in kink (and in everything we do!). It is important to establish clear boundaries, to communicate openly and honestly with your partner, and to have a safe word or signal to stop the play if necessary.
Practice self-care. Engaging in kink as a healing experience can be emotionally and physically demanding. It is important to practice self-care, to listen to your body, and to prioritize your own needs and boundaries.
Kink can be a healing experience for trauma survivors. It allows survivors to reclaim power, explore their sexuality, and release emotional pain. However, it is important to navigate that journey with a therapist who is knowledgeable, communicative, and prioritizes safety and consent.